I turned 33 just over a month ago and now that I've had some time to let that sink in, I've been reflecting on my life. A question people often ask is whether or not people can actually change. I've been looking back at who I was compared to who I feel I am now in an attempt to try and answer that question, even if the answer is one that only applies to my own life not necessarily those of others.
I always insisted that people could never truly change, that you are who you are underneath all of the pretence, the only thing that "changes" is how much effort you put into showing that or hiding it depending on whether that's who you want to be. To an extent I still hold that as true, but personal growth does have to be acknowledged. I feel like I am still the same person I always was underneath it all. The amount of effort I put into hiding that person has gone up and down in waves. I spent my teenage years in the closet afraid of people finding out I was gay because of the way I saw other guys being treated. I also grew up in an environment that was relatively conservative although in hindsight I now see that was moderate compared to what other people have experienced.
